It is amazing what gets started in your head when you have an in depth conversation and your crush’s brother has such conviction about being love unconditionally by God and that you must love yourself unconditionally.
While I may be quite different from my parents, the need to research things when you don’t understand them completely is still ingrained.
So last night I did a lot of reading:
It seems that to have unconditional love, you have to love yourself unconditionally to begin with. I have often thought that I already have loved my little man unconditionally but it can’t become true unconditional love unless I am able to figure out how to love myself. I don’t want my baby to ever question if I loved him, or how much I loved him when he’s older and when I’m gone.
So as painful and as difficult as this journey may be….it must be done.